Let's look at what you really want your life to be like. How do you achieve a secure mind base from which to successfully function within this life? Yes, there are certain things you want to achieve at each age level and to be able to do this the inner turmoil and feelings of inadequacy must be overcome.
Today, everybody seems to be living on nervous energy. From the moment the alarm goes at 6.30am in the morning, stress starts to accumulate. Your body tenses at the sound of the alarm. Straight to the shower and into some clothes. Then food and drink is necessary to kick- start the body, so these are hurriedly consumed. Often others need to be helped to start their day as well.
Into some type of transport along with everyone else and the day begins. If you allow it to, the day often gets worse from there. Tension gradually creeps more and more into your body as the day progresses. Coffee and a cigarette are often taken to relieve that knotted feeling and keep up the energy levels that are needed. A drink after work with friends sometimes helps, but then it's back home, often to even more stressful situations. Turn the television on to settle things back down! Put on music to calm down! You need a nice relaxing beer or wine to accompany the meal to really feel settled.
It's now off to bed for yet another fitful sleep, where you're going to wake up feeling wrung out and tired tomorrow before you even start.
And so life continues with more of the same. Is this how you choose your life to be or is there another choice you can make?
You've tried everything to overcome these feelings and so far haven't been able to do so. Having money, a stable partner, children and a fulfilling job isn't necessarily going to give you a positive and
peaceful mind. How many people, who appear to have it all, suddenly display cracks in their armor and suddenly all the old problems again come flooding through? Just when you thought they had been plastered up and would be hidden for life, you suddenly realise cement can't conceal problems forever. Seepage will always occur. So how do you stop the flood?
Do you want to continue with this only half-functioning mind and body? Life can continue interminably with your same mindset and stressed body. Eventually your mind and body will suffer illness. But you have to go on! Everyone is depending on you and there is no other way. You have no choice but to continue.
You do have a choice! You can continue, but feeling totally differently. The situation that was once a slog is now enjoyable. The body that was becoming dis-eased is healthy again, and the mind is feeling relaxed and able to cope with anything. How is this possible? It's not just possible but it can start to happen from today onward. Is this what you want? If so find out how to let the changes begin.
How do you increase your effectiveness as an individual, while achieving happiness and positivity at the same time? How do you destress your body and calm your continually racing mind? How much more effective will you become within your whole life experience, with a relaxed mind and body? The change will alter relationships within your family, within the wider world and most importantly within yourself. Begin to accept all aspects of ‘you’ first and then the changes ‘without’ will automatically take place.
Know there are definite ways to go about this and by using and applying these workable techniques, you will change and get along with yourself and others much better.
If you want to become fit, you're prepared for a bit of effort and to set aside some time during the week. As with your body, the same applies to your mind – and then your spirit.
Set aside ten to fifteen minutes a day for the next month. Be serious and realise nobody is so busy they don't have, or can't make, ten minutes a day for themselves. Get up ten minutes early, or go to bed ten minutes later, after the children are asleep.
Yes, you do need sleep and sleep is vital to your well-being, but these techniques will only improve and enhance your sleep. More restful sleep is needed, rather than fitful sleep which is your usual sleep pattern.
This ten to fifteen minutes a day will change your life in that you will begin to finally take control. This will result in more contentment everywhere in your life – at home, at work, with friends. You will be happier and healthier in every aspect of life. You will not just have a more positive attitude to yourself, it will overflow into all aspects of your life.
Are you prepared to take a chance that will repay you for the rest of your life? Then read on and set aside ten minutes – starting today!
Take Action
To achieve the result you are looking for a few things need to be set in place to get your body and mind underway…
1. Relax your body
2. De-stress your mind
3. Increase feelings of self confidence
4. Let go of the past and practice forgiveness
5. Take responsibility and make decisions
6. Take control
1. Relax your Body
Start with your body. Every day you spend time feeding your body, cleaning it and exercising it. People seem to concentrate more on one of these, but a balance needs to be achieved. The body houses the mind and temporarily your soul, therefore just as you feed, clean and exercise, you need to relax the body daily as well. Only from a relaxed body can a de-stressed mind occur.
A relaxed body will help you sleep better, function better and ultimately result in a more dynamic you. Surely such a small investment is worth it!
Remind yourself before you start, that this body needs to keep functioning in good condition for an average of eighty years. If you don't want a life of continual ill health, you have to function from a positive body and mind base. This means relaxation and rest as well as work and play. Relax the body and restorative sleep will return.
Once a day, before retiring for the night is a good place to start. This can be increased to morning as well as at night if you want to increase your ability to cope with stress. Start small and big things will begin to happen.
Alter your routine a fraction – put the children to bed a littleearlier. Turn off the television for half an hour to give you time to clear your mind and relax before bed. Turn the unmindful chaos of the evening into a time to give yourself more space and consequent peace. Just a few minutes are all that is necessary.
Your body takes a battering every day in this fast-paced modern lifestyle, but spending that few minutes during the day it can make a huge difference. Any spare moment you can find – sitting on the train, in bed before you fall asleep or when you wake in the morning, watching television, take that few moments and give yourself a few minutes break. It will reap huge rewards.
The Exercise
While sitting down, imagine that your body is entirely limp. Let it all go. Your feet and legs are so light you could float away, drifting in space – weightless.
1. Start with your feet. Make sure they are on the ground, with your hands gently beside you. Take three deep breaths and breathe out again each time slowly. Make sure you empty your lungs fully with each breath. You can feel the lightness spreading to your legs.
2. Then lift your left ankle and circle it, letting it fall back gently to the floor. Do the same to your right ankle. Easy does it.
3. Now you're ready. Raise your left arm and let it fall limply on your knee. Do the same to your right arm. They've both fallen limply on your knees. Your body is slowly relaxing and the
tension leaving.
4. Allow your head to circle around your body to the right and then to the left. Then let it hang gently limply down.
5. Take three deep breaths, exhaling each slowly, totally emptying the lungs each time. Feel as though you are gradually getting rid of the problems and frustrations of the day.
6. How is your face feeling? Is it still taut or screwed up? Gently relax those face muscles along with your eye muscles. Let your eyes open and shut three times. You are feeling relaxed. Every taut muscle is slowly easing.
7. Remember who you are. You are Me in a bodily form. I am now showing you how to relax and be at peace. Slowly repeat those words, “Peace. Be still.” You are now feeling the healing touch of this peace throughout your body. Every part of your body, throughout every muscle, there is a peaceful renewal of
energy and total relaxation.
8. You are now renewed and feeling totally relaxed. Enjoy this feeling as you know that this will increase your energy levels and positivity. You will arise feeling rested and renewed.
9. Give yourself a few minutes holding this thought. Then arise slowly feeling full of energy and refreshed. This prescription can be filled night and morning. Feel the peace and healing power of this peace throughout your whole body.
2. De-stressing your mind
After the body, the mind needs to be looked at. After all, how can your body feel at peace when your mind is a seething turmoil of fears and frustrations? Unresolved conflicts swim around in your brain, along with thoughts of anger and powerlessness. Your body displays unconscious restless movements, such as feet and hand tapping. So how can you possibly be at peace in any way when this is constantly happening?
Your mind carries a swollen mass of thoughts and emotions – Learned habits, predictable outcomes, masses of swirling daydreams and thoughts. Why is it that the outcomes of your actions end up in the same place? It's so predictable. At the outset happiness reigns – this time it will all work out well and there will be a happy ending. This time. Looking back that's what you always think, and here you are once again looking at the final results. It's unhappy and not what you want. You can't believe this has happened again. What can you do?
Let's work on de-stressing your mind. This exercise goes with relaxing your body. Both need to be practiced for a balanced technique which will lead to total relaxation of body and soul.
1. You are back in the chair with your feet touching the ground and your arms hanging limply on your knees.
2. You are breathing again in and out. Three deep breaths will as before. Hold these breaths to a count of five, and then make sure you totally empty your lungs when you breathe out.
3. Focus on your thoughts. They are rushing through your brain at a million miles an hour. Consciously calm that raging sea. Feel them subsiding until the waters are now placid and peaceful. They've become a quiet lake, not a sea. Or mentally sit on top of a mountain and watch them all race by below you, deliberately not
‘thinking’ about anything, just letting it all go and have no effect on you. Just watch, and those thoughts will gradually slow and your mind becomes empty.
4. Now think of the most beautiful places you have ever seen. They can be next door, or half way around the world. Here the waters are still, the trees swaying and the birds chirping. The desert could be singing its lonely song, or the oasis radiating its calm air of plenty and security. This is the place for you, where you can return at any time throughout your busy day for strength and renewal. From this scene know that you are meant to be, and can be, a peaceful being. Keep this scene in a place in your mind to pull out any time you need to settle, quiet you thoughts, and focus.
5. Realize who you are. You are no longer a helpless and lonely person. You are God's body in the flesh. You can control your life now. Let go of the drama and unhappiness. This you created as you felt you needed excitement in your life. It's only bought you pain and unhappiness. This angry, complex existence can be replaced by a simple, happy life if you choose for it to be so. Choose peace and you will have it.
6. Whenever you feel stressed throughout the day, remind yourself of who you are, and return to that peaceful place you created. This place will renew your energy levels and recharge your battery. By choosing peace instead of stress, the dramatic situations will become less and less, and you will be able to cope more and more. The feelings of helplessness will be gradually replaced by feelings of control. Just close your eyes for a second and remember who you are, and where you choose to be.
7. Peace be with you.
You are now ready to move on – ready to move forward. Ready to do what it takes to turn your life around. You want your life to become positive so you can interact more lovingly with your family, have more friends and get on better with people socially and at work. You want to go from being a “bad” person (a taker) to being one of life's “good” people (a giver). As you have chosen your life, being “good” or “bad” is totally subjective. But being a person who always takes what is offered and never gives anything back is the definition of positivity and negativity. Your goal becomes what you want to be – one of life's givers. When you can start to give back, happiness automatically follows.
You've finally realised that you need peace in your life. Some sort of feeling of contentment within yourself. Some way that you can feel solid enough within yourself to springboard into life. To realise what you actually ‘need’ is the first major step.
Even if you only have a minute sitting in a chair, you are just consciously loosening the knots within your body, from letting your head hang loosely for a moment, to resting your legs and arms and heading to that peaceful place that you created, cherish, and remember so well. Peace. Be still.
As you practice these exercises, you will gradually start to feel more rested, not as stressed and more refreshed. With being more relaxed you will cope easier, focus better, so at the end of the day you don't
have to take piles of ‘unfinished’ to-do lists home with you.
You have made your first important steps towards a better life for yourself and all those around you.
3. Increasing feelings of self confidence
To become a giver means putting yourself first. This sounds like the ultimate selfish act, but is necessary for change. If you always focus on what others need and want, ultimately this leads to thoughts of powerlessness and resentment.
Between you and those you love, a pattern has been established over many years. Power has started with parents over children. Hopefully, this power has not been wrongfully used and clung to as the child grows towards adulthood. By this time, some sort of balance ought to have been achieved. The child should be able to move into their adult life unencumbered by feelings of guilt, and a new neutral, balanced
base established within the family.
Often that child grows up with feelings of deep unresolved conflict towards that period of their lives. If these feelings are not resolved, that person will have a distorted map of reality. This dysfunction will lessen the person's ability to cope with reality and stress levels.
A flexible and safe childhood leads to a greater ability to cope with change, and adjust to the changing circumstances of life. Resisting life's reality due to unresolved childhood problems leads to suffering and needless grief. This resistance will eventually lead to behavioral problems within that person. At one end of the scale these problems appear as addiction, while at the other end they appear as apparently milder personality problems. Both have the same root cause. The result depends on how each individual reacts to a certain
trigger.
Why does God want me to be ill?
I don't. Know this. I want you to have nothing but joy, love and peace in your life. Exactly what you want for yourself. But do you want this? You think you do, but you have chosen illness over health. Think about this. How could it be so? How could you choose to die from cancer? Dig deep into your soul for this answer.
Why does your soul need this suffering to overcome?
Know you can choose to be healed. Healing takes place every day, but it's only when the soul chooses to live and be positive that it can take place. The further you progress in your learning, the more you realise that suffering in your life is not necessary. You can ask to be healed. When you believe, and use gratitude with a true heart and positive spirit, the healing will happen. Your whole attitude has to be positive for this to happen.
Human beings allow illness to take place in their lifestyle choices. City dwellers live in a lead-polluted environment. They drink water containing poisons and eat food containing the same thing. This is your choice and of course, you suffer for this. You smoke cigarettes and live in high stress situations. That is why so many people are sick.
Make different choices and move on with positive thoughts towards yourself and others. Choose healing and allow it to take place.
But I am a terrible person full of anger and hatred
Know your real nature. Why do all humans when asked what they want reply with a car, house, partner, better job etc. This is what you think you want, but all you really want is happiness and love. Why do you all want the same thing worldwide? Because this is your true nature, though you don't always remember. That's it. All these ideas you only need to remember. They are already tucked away inside you, ready, willing, and able to come out. With contentment and knowledge, comes peace from within.
Remember you are a being of light and energy. You are God in the flesh. Appreciate yourself. Remember you are unique as an individual. Your real nature is one of inner beauty. You have forgotten to appreciate yourself and have lost all love for yourself. Nothing happens to you, or through you, that is not your choice. Learn to
forgive yourself for the past and choose a positive future – move forward.
As you are pure energy, you must choose to be either high energy or low energy. Of course you want to run on high energy which creates positivity and contentment. If you choose to function on low energy levels, you choose negative qualities such as anger, hatred, and pride. If these factors are predominant in your life, grief will always overtake you.
Only through functioning on high energy levels will happiness and the true ability to take control of your life happen. Life is not random as most people believe – you just allow it be so. You can choose to run on high energy and take control. Remember you are not alone and are Me in a bodily form, so don't limit yourself – take control.
What pushes your buttons?
An uneven power base has probably developed over many years – this could be caused by someone within your family from childhood. The unresolved problem then spills over into negative frustrations, and the same situation develops within all your subsequent relationships.
You have learned to be a victim
Here you must realise that no matter how many times you relax each day with the learned exercise, this situation will not change on its own. The power base has manifested itself over such a long period that only a selfish, conscious step on your part can change it.
It is totally selfish on your part to allow the negative ‘victim’ situation to continue. If you allow bullying, it is bad for both you and the aggressor. That person will receive the message what they have always done is all right. Love of yourself and others demands that you stop them and make them realise that it is not all right. To allow them to continually hurt others and inflict damage is not the most loving thing to do. That abuser if allowed to continue can develop into a ruthless and cruel character. You develop feelings of hate towards
them and they become the unbending thug. Never allow this ‘victim’ situation to continue. Highest love requires a forceful, positive response.
You can't change others, but you can allow them to glimpse the true situation. When you know that you're creating your reality continually, you will realise that you can change how you react to the situation. It will take time for both of you, but from now on let them know how you feel then step away from that situation.
Most people's grief and frustration stems from trying to change their situation by changing others. You can explain to someone why they need to change, but ultimately you cannot make them change. If they decide to change themselves that is a different matter. A learned situation that has come about through many years of ‘conditioning’ takes a lot of positive changes. You have to step back and monitor your reactions. When you see the constant way you react to that behaviour, only then can you decide to react another way.
The ringing of alarm bells should arise when you feel discomfort, pain or suffering because of a certain situation. Then you know you are resisting that situation for whatever reason. What can you do to rectify the problem?
1. If you are involved with that person, allow them to know your thoughts on the situation for their own benefit. Feelings of love cannot be allowed to turn into frustration and hatred without a fight.
2. You cannot change that person, so you either have to stop resisting them and allow whatever happens, or walk away. As you are creating your own reality constantly, you can change yourself and your own reaction to that situation. This then allows the situation to be alright as you have let it go. If you don’t, you are creating constant suffering for yourself.
3. If you can't get rid of the trigger then you must change your reaction. By lowering your stress levels through relaxation of your mind and body you will be better able to cope with the situation, and maybe come up with a solution.
4. By constantly reminding yourself of who you are, you will know that you choose your past and who you spend your life with.
Nothing is random. You are Me in a bodily form and you are in the life that you have chosen. Accept this, but realize you can always make another choice if this one is no longer right for you.
4. Letting go of the past and practicing forgiveness
Think of your life scenario. Look into yourself and assess the situation. What problems do you carry with you from childhood? Think about it carefully and honestly. These unresolved childhood situations will come back again and again to haunt you.
Look at yourself objectively now, and assess how flexible you are. If you're fluid in your life and in most situations, you are not carrying too much baggage with you now. But if you feel sensitive in your reactions, and have a low tolerance level to life, it means you're carrying unresolved problems around with you.
How do you react to small annoyances? If you're feeling you are overreacting and flying off the handle to everything, you have a problem. Your threshold levels to stress show how you're coping with life.
Depending on how low your coping mechanism is will show how little you've resolved your problems. The lowest threshold and you will be an addict, mentally ill and deeply into self-destruct mode. How much you're into destroying your life and the lives of those around you will show how little you've faced your problems. You might think you've covered up everything nicely, but they'll always resurface, usually when you least expect it.
High stress threshold levels show you are able to resolve your problems. You're de-stressing your mind and body and going forward in life. Keep up the good work and continue to de-stress, and your life can continue fluidly.
You have a choice. Either step forward and try to resolve things or spiral downwards, often taking along those who you are closest to. Ultimately, this will often lead to suicidal thoughts and actions. Or, change to positive behaviour and create your life how you want it to be. Decide which way you are heading now and a course of action before it is too late.
Forgiving others and yourself
Guilt. That's the keyword. You've learned to feel guilty about everything. You've always been told that you are “bad” from the start. If you've ever done something that a person with power over you at that time didn't like, you were branded “bad and unmanageable”. Whatever you did was always wrong from that power base
perspective. You have been taught to feel shame for being born less than perfect.
God will punish you for being imperfect you are told. That punishment can take the form of smacking or abuse as a child, to mental and physical abuse as an adult. The parent and tormentor have taken on the role of God in deciding what you are to be punished for. But you eventually think you deserve it.
Know that you are Me in physical form. Therefore you were born perfect and have nothing to forgive yourself for. All the rest is a learned response to a victim situation. Why would I ever create anything less than perfect? If you look at the tiniest snowflake or flower, you know that everything always starts perfectly. The snowflake and flower have short spans of existence, but even when they wilt and melt, they are in tune with the laws of nature. Nothing ever happens out of rhythm.
You have allowed this initial perfection to become unbalanced. Your mind has become poisoned with negativity and guilt, and this has translated into a diseased body.
The only way forward from here is to start to move towards that initial balance of mind and body. This will bring positivity once more into your life, and you can again seek happiness.
5. Taking responsibility and making decisions
I can't get over a death in my family. I could have contributed more to their welfare when they were alive and even prevented it. I'll always live with the guilt.
I've always lived in an abusive environment. From early childhood onwards until now, everyone who feels they have some power over me has used me as a punching bag. No wonder I'm an addict.
Look at these problems squarely.
1. Blame. You're blaming yourself or others for all the woes that have occurred in your life. Wrong.
2. Know that you have chosen your life situation. You chose your parents and family. How they affected you even as a child was your choosing. But how can a child choose anything? You appear as a child, but that child is an old soul. You have been here before in many different life situations, and even though physically you
are young and vulnerable, the old soul has chosen this as a learning situation. You might have to go through a similar situation many times in many lives, until you finally feel as though you have learnt what you need, and can resolve the situation.
3. You can choose to overcome this situation now. Remember you are never alone. You are Me and I am always with you to help you overcome anything you choose to do. You'll have to work through this life scenario at some stage in your physical lifetimes. If you don't do it now you'll have to face it again until you can do it.
4. When you realise that whatever happens in each person's lifetime is their choice, only then can you forgive yourself. Only then can guilt pass as you finally understand now that your loved one choose their death – in that way and at that time. You couldn't have changed a thing. Any guilt or blame is a wasted emotion from
your and their perspective.
5. You were born a perfect being. I never create in any other way. You were born in the manner and place of your choosing. You can head back to that perfection whenever you finish with the drama. Look at yourself, you're addicted to the drama of life. The excitement and rush of the continual ebb and flow of life, that's what you love. Until you choose peace above pace, you'll never move. Your life will continue in the same negative way. You have to realise that the only way you can live in harmony with yourself and consequently others, is with a peaceful and balanced mind and soul.
6. I forgive you for everything as really there's nothing to forgive. Both you and the victim decided on whatever you did. You both needed that act from which to grow. Know that this growth is negative, but still requires no forgiveness. You are in your chosen place. But know you can choose another place.
7. You cannot change anyone else, only yourself. By changing yourself, the other person hopefully by example will want to change as well. Lead on toward the light and others will follow.
8. Don't judge another as each soul is in their chosen place at the right time. Their time to move forward mightn't be the same as yours. They can be encouraged, but not forced to do so. Help but don't judge them.
9. Walk on with Me into the light.
6. How do I take control of my life?
Remember you decide what happens to yourself. You will take a long time to realise this fact and digest the implications. Once you do, your life will immediately change. Before your life usually evolved randomly and unconsciously on your part – “Whatever will be will be.” You stumbled along without conscious thought, and life went on however miserably.
Decide from today onward that this stops. Take control. Realise fate doesn't exist and you will move forward to a much happier future. Know you are part of Me and as such you can decide on whatever is necessary for your soul to evolve. “You can move mountains.”
Begin with a new attitude. Stop the past dictating your future. Know you can create your own destiny. Stop the addiction to drama that you all crave. When you don't need the drama anymore, you can finally plant a new seed to a happy future. This can be achieved through practical methods whereby peace is brought back into your life and you can realise that you are never alone.
How could you be, when you are part of Me and I am always with you?
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